Perceptions

****longer read****

I wanted to share this post to give my insight but also send a heart felt message about what it feels like to be in our shoes, in this journey, at this time in our lives.

I've always been someone who "worries" about perceptions. 

I've tried many attempts to "get over it", not without fail most of the time. 

In our adoption journey, my biggest concern was over the "perception" of what others may think when we start our fundraising campaign.

I had countless conversations with people about it. 

One day, I had an unexpected conversation with one of our pastor's at church.  He is just one of those special people who truly have a gift of sharing wisdom and encouragement.  

I was at one of my blank space moments at the computer struggling to find words to say in regards to starting our fundraising campaign.  In a sense, doubting every thought about why should we be asking others to help us.  

My pastor shared a message with me about how important it is to "allow others to provide blessing upon us" if that's what they feel led to do.  To deny them of that opportunity (because of my fear and perception) is like saying no to God and what He has provided and called others to do.  

Those who know me, can share about my genuine LOVE to give to others.  It would never be questioned, I pray.   Giving is much better than receiving in my book, but I've realized during our adoption journey, that it's OK for us to be recipients of what others feel led to give to us.

Wow, can't believe I just said that.  Therapy breakout moment.

Having said that, I still struggle with that nasty little P word:  Perception.

I pray that those along with us in our journey know how deeply appreciative we are as a family for all the blessings we have so far been given.  We never take such for granted. 

We do have a lot of money left to raise, this is the truth. 

We own businesses, we can pay our bills, we have two cars, we "treat" ourselves once in a while,  we don't live lavishly, but we are blessed by having our daily needs met and we are THANKFUL every single day. 

TRUTH:   We cannot "afford" our adoption expenses.  Believe me, no one can.  It truly  takes a village to make this happen.  We are doing what we can to make extra money (craft shows, fundraisers, rummage sales, shoe drives, etc..)

We need to continue fundraising and we know that God equips those who can and willingly want to give, and want to truly and unconditionally be a part of our journey to bring home our child.  Our little boy is waiting for us, we are waiting for him along with our family and friends who are just as excited to meet him and welcome him home with us.

I'm choosing to let go of my "perception worries" today.

Those who have given from their HEART, have truly blessed us beyond measure.  

I pray my new "perception" is trusting in God's provisions, including sending people to us who feel led to be part of our journey to bring home our little Gus, and not to worry over negative perceptions.  It's all about God's plan.  Jeremiah 29:11.